Musings Of A Love Struck Soul
by Authoress Without A Cause
Summary: Kurama ponders his relationship with a certain someone. Featuring a non-cannon, shounen-ai pairing. Possibly one-shot.


Yu Yu Hakusho does not belong to me and I do not wish it to.  
  
This story, on the other hand, is a figment of my imagination and very much my property.  
  
Please take into account that this story is contains shounen-ai; male on male romantic relations. Do not proceed any further if you find homosexuality offensive. Also, this pairing is a very unpopular one. (If you don't understand what I mean by that statement, I am trying to say that the couple is NOT Kurama/Hiei.)  
  
This fanfiction is most likely going to be a one-shot. This is Kurama's point of view on his relationship with a certain someone and questioning if it is beyond just friendship. It is shounen-ai, but the pairing must, I fear, remain secret until the end if you do not figure it out before hand. It may have an alternate timeline and Kurama will most likely be a bit out of character. And I will warn you once more, this is a shounen-ai story, which means there is male on male romance.  
  
~Start~  
  
I sit in my room and look out my open window at the gray suburban area surrounding my domain.  
  
The day seems extremely gloomy, probably caused by the fact that it was a very hot, humid summer's day.  
  
The weather, however, is not what troubles me so. I am engrossed in thought.  
  
Thought about Him.  
  
I tap my index finger repeatedly on the windowsill.  
  
Who is he, many people might wonder.  
  
ÒHeÕs just a friendÓ would be my reply.  
  
But...  
  
Is that really all He is to me?  
  
IÕm very sure, however, thatÕs all I am to him.  
  
I sigh and set my chin upon the palm of my hand.  
  
ÒFriends...Ó I say the word under my breath, in an almost disgusted way.  
  
Why does the idea of us only being friends peeve me so much?  
  
Do I really like Him like that?  
  
No.  
  
I am most certainly not attracted to anyone of the same sex.  
  
Not even though I myself could easily mistaken for one of the opposite.  
  
And yet...  
  
I have caught myself wondering what His lips would taste like.  
  
And a few other places...  
  
My face turns a color similar to that of my hair.  
  
I try to shake my last thought out of my head, but only succeed in loosing my balance and falling backwards onto the floor.  
  
ÒOw...Ó  
  
I lay on the floor, staring up at the ceiling.  
  
That wasnÕt a thought one normally has about a friend.  
  
But IÕm not normal, am I?  
  
Neither is He...  
  
HeÕs special.  
  
HeÕs funny, loyal, noble, and...  
  
Beautiful.  
  
No, definitely not a thought one has about a friend.  
  
Maybe He does mean more to me than that...  
  
Maybe I have fallen head-over-heals for him...  
  
Time for a test.  
  
I close my eyes and imagine IÕm at a beach, surrounded by many pretty girls wearing bikinis.  
  
Nothing.  
  
Now I think of myself sitting across from Him at a park.  
  
He turns to face me.  
  
My stomach seems to do a somersault.  
  
I open my eyes again.  
  
Unless IÕve caught a disease in less than three seconds, I do believe I am in love.  
  
I grimace.  
  
Well, thatÕs not good news.  
  
What should I do?  
  
Should I tell him?  
  
This is so hard...  
  
I sit up, but I feel my foot come in contact with something soft.  
  
ÒHm?Ó  
  
I look at the windowsill and notice the lack of a certain object given to me by a certain someone.  
  
Oh no.  
  
I hastily get up, and run out of the room.  
  
I donÕt even bother to put my shoes back on.  
  
ÒPlease be okay, please be okay, please be okay...Ó  
  
I hurry down the stairs and out the door.  
  
When I finally reach my destination, I sigh with relief.  
  
I pick up the small cat toy that fell out from itÕs perch in my room.  
  
ÒIÕm so glad youÕre okay, Ninjin-chan.Ó  
  
Ninjin-chan was the only thing He ever gave me.  
  
I remember what it was a reward for.  
  
~Memory~  
  
ÒHere.Ó He tossed the small cat plush-doll to me.  
  
ÒWhatÕs this for?Ó I asked.  
  
He grins.  
  
ÒItÕs for helping me fool that moron. The look on his face way totally priceless.Ó  
  
I chuckle.  
  
ÒYes, I have to admit, it was quite amusing to watch his eyes grow when he thought something had happened to Keiko. That was some pretty good acting you did.Ó  
  
ÒYou mean we did. I couldnÕtÕve done it without you, Kurama.Ó  
  
ÒStop it. YouÕre making me blush.Ó  
  
We both laughed.  
  
But what He didnÕt know was that I wasnÕt kidding.  
  
~Flashback ends~  
  
A couple minutes later, I set the little cat back in his place.  
  
ÒI love you Ninjin-chan.Ó I say softly.  
  
I pause for a second.  
  
I think of the person who gave the stuffed animal to me.  
  
I think of all the times HeÕs sacrificed himself.  
  
Of all the times HeÕs laughed with me.  
  
Of all the times HeÕs told me what he told no one else.  
  
Of all the times HeÕs been the most perfect person He could be: Himself.  
  
ÒAnd I love you too, Kuwabara.Ó  
  
~End?~  
  
If I receive at least one positive review from someone who wishes for me to write more to this story, I will gladly continue.  
  
If you found this story offensive in any way and feel the urge to send me an extremely negative response, you may. I have no way of stopping you and this is a free country, or so IÕve heard.  
  
Thank you, and goodbye. 


End file.
